In Nigeria’s south-south area, many ladies carry a heavy burden as moms who function the providers for his or her households. Behind their resilience lies a quiet wrestle that impacts the dietary and emotional well-being of their youngsters.
They usually engaged in casual work and, confronted with restricted monetary help, stretched meagre earnings to maintain their households afloat. However survival comes at a steep worth — malnutrition, psychological stress, and emotional gaps that ripple throughout generations.
Joan Ukadike, a petty dealer and mom of 4 from Alihame in Delta State, is aware of this actuality all too effectively.
The load of duty usually extends past monetary burdens to a quieter, extra insidious toll on her well being, time, and emotional well-being.
Mrs Ukadike’s days are a relentless cycle of labor and caregiving, leaving little room for relaxation or self-care.
“It tells on the girl due to the well being misery. It’s very worrying,” she stated, her voice carrying the weariness of years of endurance. “However you do what it’s important to do to maintain the household going. You don’t depart all of the duty to the lads.”
Identical to Mrs Ukadike, Magdalene Festus, a petty dealer and mom of 5 who resides in Benin Metropolis, spoke in regards to the realities and challenges of her position within the household.
Mrs Festus famous that, as a mom, the duty of taking good care of the family usually falls fully on her.
“As a mom, it’s not simple. The journey is lengthy, and it requires partnership, however when the help isn’t there, you’re left to bear all of it,” she stated.
She noticed the affect this imbalance has on youngsters. “These days, you see many youngsters with fathers, however they’re like youngsters with out fathers. There’s no steerage, no self-discipline, and no partnership in elevating and offering for them.”

Financial realities rewriting household roles in Nigeria
In lots of African societies, conventional gender roles demand that males function the first suppliers, whereas girls play the nurturing position and handle family maintenance. The person, considered as the top of the household, is anticipated to bear the burden of its well-being, with girls positioned as supporters reasonably than equal contributors. Nevertheless, this custom is progressively altering.
Present financial realities and shifting social norms are rewriting these expectations. A major shift is obvious in low-income communities throughout Africa, the place many girls have taken on the position of major breadwinners, sustaining households by buying and selling, farming, and small-scale companies.
A 2016 survey by the Nationwide Bureau of Statistics (NBS) revealed that 21.1 per cent of Nigerian households had been female-led, indicating an early shift in conventional household dynamics.
The newest NBS 2023/2024 Normal Family Survey-Panel Wave 5 shows that female-headed households now account for 22.3 per cent of the entire, marking a 1.2 proportion level enhance over seven years.
Whereas the South-East zone had the best proportion of feminine breadwinners, with 34.4 per cent, the South-South zone had the second highest with 30.8 per cent. The South-West got here third with 29.7 per cent, adopted by the North-Central with 17.1 per cent, the North-East with 12.1 per cent and the North-West with 10.3 per cent.
The NBS report famous that the South-South area recorded probably the most dramatic rise, with a 6.9 proportion level enhance between Wave 4 and Wave 5, signalling a basic shift in who holds the financial reins at house.
Behind these statistics are private tales of resilience. For ladies like Mrs Festus, changing into a breadwinner was not by selection however by circumstance. She misplaced her husband some years in the past.
“I’ve 5 youngsters, and my final baby is 13 years previous,” she defined. “We had been hoping for a boy earlier than I misplaced my husband. Now, it’s all on me. Any girl relying solely on a person as of late is losing her time.”
Others, like Mrs Ukadike, share an analogous expertise. Although her husband is current, she assists in paying the payments, as a part of her perception that parental cooperation is crucial for household stability.
“The present financial realities require energetic participation from each dad and mom,” she stated, “as a result of unity and cooperation forestall conflicts and create a harmonious surroundings for the kids.”
Silent toll on moms and baby diet
For each Mrs Ukadike and Festus, the twin position of being a mom and supplier for the family places a number of stress on their lives. The lengthy hours spent juggling work and family obligations depart them with little time for his or her youngsters.
“The time you could spend with them to review or speak, you end up dozing off,” Mrs Ukadike stated. But, she discovered methods to reconcile her circumstances, striving to make sure her household stays intact.
For a lot of households, girls serving as major suppliers have penalties, significantly in diet. These girls stretch restricted sources to satisfy the wants of their youngsters, usually on the expense of correct nourishment.
A nutritionist and well being educationist from Benin Metropolis, Religion Uwa, stated the diet and well-being of youngsters are affected when struggling moms are the breadwinners.
“Nutritionally and health-wise, it impacts them negatively,” Ms Uwa defined.
“Let’s say, as an example, a mom has a toddler between six months and one 12 months. At this stage, they’re alleged to be consuming baby-formulated milk like NAN, SMA Gold, or Cerelac. However the girl usually can not afford these,” she stated.
“As a substitute, she resorts to cheaper alternate options like Peak Milk or Cowbell, which aren’t designed for infants. This could trigger malnutrition for the kid.”
Moreover, a psychologist and advocate for girls, Nnyen Adomi, defined that such girls expertise psychological pressure, characterised by signs of burnout, anxiousness, and, in lots of instances, subclinical or medical despair.
Ms Adomi stated combining nurturing and offering roles can result in emotional depletion, a state the place girls really feel incapable of caring for themselves, not to mention for others. This example, she stated, is exacerbated by the invisibility of their labour.
‘’Many ladies within the South-South work informally, promoting items, offering providers, or participating in agriculture with out receiving recognition or sufficient compensation for the hassle they make investments. Societal expectations that ladies must be pure caregivers additional discourage them from looking for assist, making a silence round their misery.’’

Mrs Ukadike’s wrestle wasn’t nearly assembly monetary wants. It was additionally about sustaining a way of normalcy for her youngsters and shielding them from the fractures inside the household dynamic. She believed in retaining a united entrance, even when her husband’s contributions fell brief.
The price of malnutrition and monetary instability
The affect of those struggles isn’t restricted to the moms. Youngsters in households with overburdened breadwinners might bear lifelong penalties.
A report by the Gates Basis highlights the long-term results of childhood starvation, revealing that people who skilled starvation as youngsters earn 10 per cent much less over their lifetimes and are 33 per cent much less more likely to escape poverty.
Globally, undernutrition prices an estimated $3 trillion yearly in misplaced productiveness, with low-income nations bearing the brunt at three to 16 per cent of GDP.
The Meals and Agriculture Organisation (FAO) estimates that roughly 33.1 million Nigerians are projected to face excessive ranges of meals insecurity throughout the 2025 lean season (June–August), up from 26.5 million in 2024.
This, it stated, will put roughly 5.4 million youngsters and almost 800,000 pregnant and breastfeeding girls vulnerable to acute malnutrition.
In September 2024, the Nationwide Bureau of Statistics (NBS) in its price of nutritious diet (CoHD) for September 2024 revealed that it price a median of N1,346 to provide a single grownup a single nutritious diet.
In the meantime, Edo State ranks eighth in Nigeria for human growth, with a Human Improvement Index (HDI) of 0.633. Its poverty price is among the many lowest within the nation—roughly 8.8 per cent of residents reside under the $2.15/day threshold. Delta State, with an HDI of 0.607, boasts the bottom poverty price at 2.9 per cent.
A resident of Ugbague group in Oredo Native Authorities Space of Edo State, merely recognized as Austin, defined his actuality as a son single-handedly raised by his mom. He stated his life may need taken a special flip if not for the love he bought from his mom.
“I’m who I’m at present due to my mom. There have been issues my father ought to have accomplished that he didn’t. I cherished my mom extra as a result of she was the one who supplied for me. It’s arduous to respect a father who doesn’t take duty.”
Mr Austin highlights the societal penalties of a scarcity of parental duty. “The kid who’s left alone, typically even the mom isn’t capable of present every thing for this explicit baby. What do you count on from such a toddler?”
He connects this void in parental care to broader societal points. “Loads of issues are taking place in society as a result of parental duty is missing within the household.”
This angle underscores how the failure to satisfy a toddler’s emotional and materials wants can ripple outward, contributing to cycles of vulnerability, exploitation, and social instability.
Aisha Jimoh was solely a toddler when she realised her mom wasn’t simply her caregiver, she was the household’s sole breadwinner. “It was arduous for me to know my very own physique rising up,” she stated, her voice mushy however regular.
“My mother was all the time busy being profitable for us. I needed to depend on pals to find out about issues I ought to have realized from her. A lot of the classes got here from unhealthy experiences.”
The results of absent paternal figures and overburdened moms ripple by households, usually resulting in emotional scars and lowered alternatives for kids like Austin and Ms Jimoh, Ms Adomi, the psychologist stated.
In accordance with her, the psychological well being of youngsters in these households is usually influenced by each the presence and the pressures stemming from their mom’s twin position.
On one hand, these youngsters might develop up internalising resilience, self-discipline, and duty by observing their moms. However, they might expertise emotional neglect if the caregiving mother or father is just too stretched to offer constant emotional help.
This dynamic, Ms Adomi stated, can result in what psychologists confer with as parentification, a course of the place the kid takes on obligations past their developmental capability, both emotionally or virtually. It could, over time, have an effect on their self-worth, attachment patterns, and coping mechanisms as they attain adolescence and maturity.
In accordance with the psychologist, youngsters don’t want good moms; they want emotionally protected environments. She added that when a caregiving-breadwinning mom is supported and validated, the constructive results prolong not solely to her psychological well being but in addition to her youngsters’s developmental outcomes.
Breaking the cycle of poverty
Research have proven that empowering girls financially is crucial to breaking the cycles of poverty and malnutrition. Research exhibits that when girls have entry to monetary sources and decision-making energy, they make investments extra in family diet, well being, and schooling.
For Sarah Osazuwa, a mom of seven, the story is one among presence with out the anticipated help.
Together with her first baby now 26 and her youngest solely 12, Mrs Osazuwa defined that whereas her husband lives with the household, he has not been capable of shoulder the obligations anticipated of him.
“If the daddy had sufficient, there can be no downside. However since he doesn’t, as a lady, you help your husband,” she stated, noting what number of girls have needed to step up just because the lads can not meet the household’s monetary wants.
Her frustration additionally displays a bigger concern about complacency amongst some males. “They aren’t severe,” she lamented. “A lot of them simply depend upon cash coming from relations overseas. ‘My sister will ship cash, my brother will ship cash.’ So that they sit again and watch for that, whereas the ladies carry the burden of the house.”
Mrs Osazuwa’s struggles underline the necessity for systemic change. Restricted entry to capital and financial alternatives perpetuates the challenges confronted by girls like her, trapping their households in cycles of hardship.

Monetary inclusion, significantly for girls, is a confirmed technique for fostering family stability and financial progress. Organisations just like the World Bank emphasise the significance of microfinance programmes and focused interventions that present girls with the instruments they should succeed.
Regardless of the chances, girls in South-South Nigeria exhibit resilience. They navigate societal expectations, financial hardship, and the emotional toll of twin roles with dedication.
Mrs Ukadike spoke of the fragile stability she maintained to defend her youngsters from the tough realities of her struggles. “If the husband isn’t cooperating, the kids will know,” she stated. “However as a mom, it’s important to hold the household collectively. Love and understanding within the house are vital, even in the event you’re the one doing every thing.”
This resilience, nonetheless, mustn’t excuse systemic neglect. Ladies like Joan and Sarah want greater than admiration; they want tangible help from policymakers, monetary establishments, and society at giant.
Sensible options amid hardship
The tales of Mrs Ukadike, Osazuwa and Festus illuminate the hidden burdens carried by South-South Nigeria’s feminine breadwinners. These girls’s sacrifices maintain their households, however at a value that society can now not afford to disregard.
Empowering girls by entry to capital, diet schooling, and coverage reforms isn’t just an ethical crucial; it’s an financial necessity. By investing in girls, we put money into households, communities, and the nation’s future.
Whereas the burden of offering for a lot of households falls closely on girls, sensible methods had been supplied by the nutritionist, Ms Uwa, to assist alleviate the quick dietary deficiencies usually brought on by financial pressure.
“When you’ve got a small area, you can begin a vegetable backyard,” the nutritionist advised to moms. She requested them to “Plant veggies like pumpkin leaves or ugu’’ saying they’re wealthy in nutritional vitamins and can be utilized in meals to spice up their dietary worth. ‘’If you happen to don’t have cash for eggs or crayfish, including pumpkin leaves to noodles or different easy meals could make a distinction.”
She additionally advisable small-scale companies as a lifeline for girls juggling tight budgets. “From such companies, you’ll be able to eat from what you promote and change it. It’s a solution to maintain your loved ones and guarantee they get some degree of correct diet,” she suggested.
As Ms Jimoh mirrored on her mom’s sacrifices, she provided a poignant reminder: “No baby ought to should study life’s classes the arduous means. Moms like mine deserve assist, and youngsters like me deserve higher.”
Ms Adomi, the psychologist, stands by her perception that the intersection of caregiving and breadwinning amongst South-South girls is greater than only a social actuality, a psychological well being crucial that must be given extra consideration. “These girls navigate techniques that aren’t designed to help them, but they proceed to carry households and communities collectively, usually at nice private price.’’
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She admonished psychological well being professionals and advocates to observe by with their duty of first acknowledging the experiences of those girls, whereas pushing for structural adjustments that may foster their psychological restoration and well-being.
These, she stated, embrace bettering entry to culturally related psychological well being providers, strengthening group help techniques, and advocating for insurance policies that recognise and redistribute the burden of unpaid care work.
By centring the voices and lived experiences of those girls, we start to shift the narrative from survival to dignity, from silence to visibility, and from burnout to therapeutic.
This reporting was accomplished with the help of the Centre for Journalism Innovation and Improvement (CJID).